Excess does not equal success –
Posted on November 19, 2015 Leave a Comment
Have you ever had a peak experience? A peak experience is a moment accompanied by a euphoric mental state often achieved by self-actualizing individuals. The concept was originally developed by Abraham Maslow in 1964, who described peak experiences as “rare, exciting, oceanic, deeply moving, exhilarating, elevating experiences that generate an advanced form of perceiving reality, and are even mystic and magical in their effect upon the experimenter.” I have a peak experience almost every time I run. I call it “passing through the portal” and it usually happens at about mile 3 or 4.
This morning the portal appeared just as I was approaching Hoboken terminal, as I ran along the Hudson river. The station was filled with commuters on their way into NYC for another day’s work. I was feeling so good and in tune with the universe that I smiled at the rush hour commuters as I approached them. That was the peak experience. I weaved my way through the busy station on my way to the bathroom to get a drink of water before heading up the Hudson for another 3 miles.
The revelation that I had running through the terminal came when I looked up at the glorious stained glass ceiling designed by Louis Comfort Tiffany. It is truly amazing and literally takes my breath away every time I see it. This morning though, the terminal was filled with commuters shuffling along on their way to the PATH trains with their faces in their iPhones. Not one of them returned the smiles that I sent their way, not one was looking up at the beauty soaring above their heads. They were literally sleep-walking through life. Others, I perceived, were experiencing a sort of fashion nightmare – but, that’s another post for another day. I was struck by the state of our culture at the moment. We have been sucked into a digital-dumb-down that’s stealing the beauty of the world right from under our noses.
As I exited the station and glimpsed the empire state building winking at me from across the Hudson, the idea came to me that excess does not equal success. The morning’s sleepwalkers had reminded me that the daily grind, or rat race if you will, does not necessarily deliver what it promises us. Sometimes, we need to step back from what society deems as successful and reevaluate what it means to be successful for us as individuals. For me, the fresh crisp fall air, the glistening waters of the Hudson, the stunning views of Manhattan and a 6.5 mile run before I start my day, are more than enough success for the entire day. Anything else that happens to me today is just gravy. That’s my peak experience thought for the day. Enjoy the beauty that is contained in every moment. You may never experience it in quite the same way ever again.
Less is More –
Posted on November 16, 2015 Leave a Comment
It was love at first sight – a relationship based on mutual respect and a common aesthetic. As Enrique and I embarck on the most ambitious journey of our twenty one year relationship, we’re leaning heavily on our trust in each other and our love of beauty. We’re becoming radical minimalists.
Living as a minimalist does not mean living like a hermit in a cave in tora bora – far from it. Minimalism asks us to strip away the unnecessary, to remove the non-essential and reject mass consumerism. So, last week that meant saying goodbye to the Mies van der Rohe Barcelona chairs we had in our living room. Van de Rohe, a minimalist himself, was most famous for saying, “God is in the details,” and “less is more.” He believed that an inspired life requires very little, but those few items should be the very best in the world.
Our apartment has always been fairly minimal, but, now we’re experimenting with letting go of more “non-essentials” to give the universe room to write a new chapter in our lives. We’re allowing space for the miraculous and the truely beautiful to transform our lives. We’re embracing minimalism in a very aggressive way – think Henry David Thoreau on crack. A new aesthetic is being born – less is more.
Untethered
Posted on November 9, 2015 1 Comment
Have you ever wondered what those sneakers hanging on the telephone wire mean? Well, there’s an urban myth that says that those seemingly random dangling sneakers indicate a place where you can buy drugs. I don’t know if it’s true and I haven’t ever tried to find out, but the myth does make me wonder – are there drugs stashed close by those old sneakers?
There are lots of urban myths out there and many are true, but just as many are just fantasy. In fact, everything we believe, think, do, say and even see, is open for interpretation – life is open for interpretation. That brings me to my current experiment with living an untethered life. I’m currently cutting the cords on quite a few belief systems that have kept me tethered to a small life for a very long time.
I’m writing this blog post on a wireless iPad. At this point at least half of the world’s population has a wireless device like a smart phone or tablet. So, why are we still tethered to old ways of living like working in an office, watching telvision via a cable or paying for a hard wire telephone line? We tether ourselves to our homes and offices without considering how much of our valuable life energy we’re expending to maintain the connection. If technology is meant to make our lives easier, why are we drowning in email management? Are we really wireless or just pretending to be free? How many devices does it take to achieve techno-freedom anyway?
I don’t have any answers to these questions, but I have a feeling that a big part of the problem is addiction. We’re a people addicted to things – that could be the latest tech gadget, trendy handbag or even the latest workout. We need more of everything to feel adequate. It’s time to truely unplug. It’s time to let go. It’s time to ignore the sneakers on the telephone wire, no matter how loudly they call to us. Cut the cord and set yourself free.
This girl is on fire – Alicia Keys runs NYC Marathon
Posted on November 4, 2015 Leave a Comment
Alicia Keys ran the NYC Marathon this past Sunday to raise funds and awareness for her foundation http://keepachildalive.org. Their mission is to realize the end of AIDS for children and their families, by combating the physical, social and economic impacts of HIV.
Thank you Alicia for inspiring us to go the distance. You rock!
Flower Bulbs, Spider Webs & Squirrels –
Posted on November 2, 2015 1 Comment
There’s something magical about planting flower bulbs in the fall. This year I’ve planted daffodils and irises. This past week I plugged about seventy five bulbs in the planters on my terrace.
The wonderful thing about planting bulbs is that after the initial effort, the universe does all the work. Beneath winter’s snow, the bulbs will take root. Then, come spring a spark of genius strikes each bulb and the miracle of the flower bloom occurs with very little effort from the gardener.
That’s the way it’s supposed to go. The foe in this story is the modern city squirrel. Just yesterday morning I discovered that a malicious neighborhood gang of squirrels had wandered onto the terrace and dug up several bulbs. They’re a messy bunch – eating their fill and leaving bulb carcasses and dirt everywhere.
To thwart another attack from this rowdy pack, I had to deploy my spider web spinning skills. I’ve covered each planter with a web made from jute twine. For just ninety nine cents and an hour’s labor, I’ve protected my tender baby bulbs from becoming squirrel snacks.
Hopefully next spring, the things we have planted in life’s garden will spring forth in a spectacular show of abundance. It’s the squirrels in life, that often spoil the show. Protecting the garden, like weeding, requires a little effort, but is well worth it. Spin your web now and watch winter work her magic. Spring is just around the corner…
FEAR is your friend –
Posted on October 27, 2015 1 Comment
My new book FEAR is now available in print and kindle formats on Amazon. FEAR explores what it takes to get to the finish line of a marathon. Of course, FEAR is an acronym for Fuck Everything And Run. But, in the context of running, it means so much more than that.
In FEAR I come face to face with a few of my inner demons – and I slay them through marathon training. Not only will we conquer fear in this book, we’ll also tackle anger, greed, judgement, sloth and my favorite, SHAME.
I’ve found freedom from some of my worst character defects through running. Along the marathon training journey, I’ve become friends with my fear and you can to. FEAR is a training manual for the marathon called life. Get your copy here…
Free FEAR Gear
Posted on October 22, 2015 Leave a Comment
To get to the finish line of a marathon you have to say yes when you’d normally say no and no when you’d normally say yes – and sometimes that just means saying, “fuck everything and run.”
My take on marathon training, FEAR, is available for presale in the Kindle format on Amazon. It officially launches on October 27th. But, for those readers that buy FEAR early, I’ve got a treat to sweeten the pot. Buy FEAR before October 27th and I’ll send you a limited edition FEAR t-shirt for free – that’s a $30 value.
Buy your presale copy of FEAR here, then forward your amazon email confirmation to me at culvercmccall@gmail.com. Please include your size (Men S-XL or Women XS-XL), your color preference (Black or White) and, of course, your name and mailing address. Thx!
Your FEAR gear should arrive around the same time as your book download. Happy reading and training!
FEAR is here –
Posted on October 13, 2015 Leave a Comment
It’s been a crazy, exciting and fulfilling year for me.
After publishing my first book Stonewall to Obama in January 2014, I’ve struggled to identify a new writing project that would be as meaningful to me as the blending of music and culture with the gay rights movement. Publishing S2O threw me a major curve ball in the form of depression. I was ill-prepared for the black hole that I fell into after launching my first book.
FEAR is my attempt to crawl out of that hole by sharing my passion for running and the miraculous impact marathon training has had on my life. It also explores the negative voices in my head that I struggle with that keep me small and hold me back from true creative freedom. You’ve probably experienced the same voices of FEAR from time to time. I know that running a marathon isn’t for everyone. But, applying the lessons I’ve learned from marathon training will benefit and inspire you to set new goals and reach new heights of success.
I invite you to purchase and read FEAR and would love to hear your thoughts on my new book – and, of course, a review on Amazon would be even better!
FEAR launches on October 27th and will be available in print and Kindle formats. You can pre-order the kindle format now and it will be auto-delivered to your device on the 27th. Get your copy of FEAR here.
Is Disco Back?
Posted on October 7, 2015 1 Comment
Lady Gaga teams up with Niles Rodgers for Tom Ford’s Spring/Summer 2016 promo vid. Their cover of Chic’s 1978 hit “I Want Your Love” is the freshest sound to emerge in a long time. The sound was also heavily featured on Gareth Pugh’s Spring/Summer 2016 runway. Perhaps Gaga and disco are back. What do you think?
Fear of Failure / Fear of Success –
Posted on October 6, 2015 Leave a Comment
Last week I sent the manuscript for my new book FEAR to my editor. Since then I’ve been in a sort of purgatory. I’ve been vascillating between fear of failure and fear of success. What if no one reads it? What if it’s a huge success? I’ve run through countless gloom and doom scenarios over the last three days. I’ve had a hard time staying in my body and remaining in present time. I’ve written a book about fear and I’m scared shitless of it!
Both ends of the FEAR spectrum are the same. It’s like flipping a coin. On a good day we struggle with fear of success. On the dark days, we battle the fear of failure demon. Either way, fear is onmipresent. I’ve learned though, that fear doesn’t have to hold us down. Fear is trying to tell us that we’re in the right place. It’s completely natural to be afraid of the unknown. No one is fearless. That’s just a lie we tell ourselves – the hero is fearless and super-human. The hero is an illusion we hold to keep us small.
It’s time to acknowledge FEAR, ask for her input, thank her and then, tell her to shut up! There’s only one authority in your life and it isn’t FEAR. It’s you. Write your story the way you want. Fear is there, merely to tell you which direction is the right one to go. The way to a magnificent life is down the scariest road you can find. Everything you’ve ever dreamed of is on the other side of fear. Let FEAR lead you to that road and then be wowed by life. As Franklin Delano Roosevelt said, “There is nothing to fear, but fear itself.” It’s time to hit the road.
Culver McCall 